I could run away…

30 09 2009
I thought I had a bad day on Sunday…well I did, it was very emotional, I was very emotional. Well Monday night also came with it’s own stresses and in a way it was worse!!

I had advertised my husbands workbench for sale on our staff noticeboard several weeks ago for £50 ono. A guy from work (whom I don’t know) contacted me to say he’d like to buy it for £20, we agreed that he could have it for that but we never heard from him again until 12 days  later. He contacted me for the dimensions of the bench (which were still in the advert, I hadn’t removed the ad as to me the bench wasn’t sold), so I gave them to him again. That was last Friday the 25th. Then on Monday afternoon the 28th another woman contacted me to say she’d like to buy the bench, she’d give me £50 for it and would pick it up that night.

I contacted the original guy to tell him that someone else was buying it and he told me I couldn’t do that as I had legally agreed to sell it to him according to Scots Law and that he was out of pocket (because he’d arranged for a van?) and that he was taking me to court.

I was like a nervous wreck, again I think the Buserelin overexaggerated my feelings about the whole thing. When I’m anxious or stressed I feel it in my stomach, usually I’d describe it as having butterflies.

Butterfly

Butterfly

Well Monday night and most of Tuesday it felt like a swarm of bees!

Swarm of bees

Swarm of bees

Yesterday morning I felt like running away, I felt I couldn’t cope and I wanted to escape all the stress. And I even think because I was so tense and stressed it caused my injection to turn out like this…

Welt on my thigh!

Welt on my thigh!

I’ve now got a sore bruise…deep sigh!

So I contacted the woman to tell her the bench had fell to pieces (just in case she threatened to take me to court too) and the original guy is coming to the house tomorrow night to pick up the bench. Now I am so angry that he has caused me so much stress, for such a small amount of money, at this time when I really need to keep stress free.

I’m back at the clinic tomorrow morning for my baseline U/S. I’ve asked DH to come with me in case they tell me I’ve got cysts or something and that they can’t continue with the IVF (I just know I’ll be a wreck and don’t want to be one all by myself). I know I’m probably thinking about it too much but I can’t help myself.

Will my body ever be the same again, will I ever be a rational, logical thinking person again… if I get a BFP I think the answer will be NOPE!! It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make ! :o)

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